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Rachel buys a psychotic sphynx cat and Phoebe learns that Gary is going to ask her to move in with him. Thinking this is way to fast, she tries to get Chandler to talk him out of this decision. Ross and Joey start throwing a ball while they are bored but it changes from a time-filler to a super-competitive obsession when Monica joins in.

As the date for Emily's remarriage draws closer, the group tries to keep Ross distracted. As a result, Ross and the other guys get invited to take a ride along with Gary.

Joey lands a role in Law & Order, and his Italian-speaking grandmother comes over to watch his network debut. Meanwhile, Ross tries unsuccessfully to flirt with the pizza delivery girl.

Rachel decides to start smoking in order to avoid missing important meetings with her boss. Meanwhile, Ben gets offered an audition for a soup commercial, and Joey auditions to be Ben's father during the ad. Also, Monica and Phoebe plan a surprise birthday party for Rachel together, but Monica takes over.

Monica and Chandler try to prove that they're more hot and heavy than Phoebe and Gary. Rachel accidentally kisses her job interviewer at Ralph Lauren. Joey tries to meet a girl living in Ross's building, but Ross meets her first.

Joey starts dating Katie, a little girl who packs a mean punch. When Ross refuses to contribute to the retirement fund of the building's maintenance man, he winds up offending everyone in the building.

When the friends discover that Ugly Naked Guy is moving out of his apartment, Ross leaps at the opportunity to get his own place again. Phoebe finds out about Monica and Chandler's relationship, and tries to get them to reveal the truth by seducing Chandler.

Monica gives Chandler a painful massage. Joey wears a top hat for an audition. A disgusted Rachel offers to dress him. Phoebe's grandmother died. Rachel hooks Joey up with a "shoulder bag". Phoebe tells Ursula, who is disinterested. At the memorial service, Phoebe meets her father, who plays it off and runs away. At his audition, Joey's bag distracts the casting people. Phoebe and her father talk at Central Perk.

Monica begins to hang out with Chandler during his work functions, since they don't have to keep their relationship a secret among his coworkers. However, she learns that Chandler has a second, more annoying personality when he's around his boss. Meanwhile, Ross learns that Emily is getting remarried and in his grief hooks up with an old nemesis of the gang: Janice.

With the New Year, the friends make New Year's resolutions. Ross resolves to try a new thing every day. Chandler resolves to not make fun of his friends for a week. Joey resolves to learn how to play the guitar, with Phoebe as his teacher. Rachel resolves to give up gossiping. Chandler nearly goes insane holding it all in. Ross is stuck in a sticky situation at his date's apartment, in constricting and hot leather pants. Rachel discovers a big secret (Monica and Chandler) that threatens to spoil her resolution.